52 Stocking Stuffers for Your Wife That Don’t Suck

When you ask your wife what she wants for Christmas, how many times has she replied with “Nothing, darling”? Well, now you can give her exactly what she asked for! Nothing! Packaged with a note explaining that the recipient has received absolutely nothing, this gift will work best if it is the first thing she opens on Christmas morning. Well, apart from her eyes, obviously.

Bring a little bit of naughty fun back into the marriage this Christmas, with this Spicy Dice. With three dice included, each one will give you a combination of what to do and where to do it. It will even tell you where in the house (or not, as the case may be) to carry out each move! It will make a saucy change from charades, that’s for sure!

Does your wife often come home, and complain to you about the bad driver, the poor parking, the rude sales assistant, or any other annoying person she’s come across during the day? You’d love her to tell them what she thinks, right, but you’re also afraid that she will cross the wrong guy? Well, now she can let off steam at the people who quite rightly deserve it! All she needs to do is tear out the relevant letter, stick it where it can be seen, and walk quickly away! The perp will be called out, and your ears will get a rest!

“Dang it, I wish I’d said something to that guy, now.” If the lady in your life is the sort of person who will always come up with a witty remark long after the incident, then these cards are perfect for her! Geared towards every driver’s nemesis, the inconsiderate parker. With cutting remarks such as the lines aren’t just a suggestion, idiot, she can vent her spleen at the driver without risking an angry comeback, and go about her business, happy in the knowledge that an idiot driver will be mightily hacked off!

Anyone knows how frustrating it can be to try and get things done in the dark. Trying to find your keys, reading a map when you are lost at night, looking for change in your pocket or purse. These amazing little lightbulbs are the perfect solution. They are credit card sized, so can be slipped into a wallet or purse, and they light up as you fold the lightbulb upright, and switch off again when folded flat.

These cute little love tokens are a gorgeous way of making sure your loved one can get a hug, a kiss, or many other gestures of love, simply by exchanging one of the tokens. Made from pewter, they are long lasting, and can be used again and again. There’s something to be said for ‘giving to receive’, because you’ll get the same in return.

Any man who knows anything about women, knows that when she gets out a tub of ice cream and one spoon, it’s time to take cover! This ice cream pint cover will show her you understand, and that at the same time you don’t want her to get frostbite from hugging the tub to her chest!

It will take a brave man to gift this to his wife for Christmas! However, she may just thank you one day when she finds herself caught short on a long car journey and realizes you have thoughtfully packed it in the trunk! No more lamenting the fact that men can go anywhere, now the ladies can too. You may intend it as a prank stocking stuffer, but one day she’ll be grateful!

Do you worry about your lady when she goes out, especially at night? What if she breaks down and can’t call because her phone has run out of charge? Or she can’t find her keys in the dark? This gift really shows you care – a power bank for her phone and a flashlight, all packaged up to look like a pretty lipstick. Peace of mind for both of you.

It will take a lady with a good sense of humor to appreciate this stocking stuffer! This novelty minty fresh breath spray, aka the anti-nagging spray, might not stop her nagging, but if all else fails, when she starts telling you to pick up your socks/put down the toilet seat, you can kiss her to stop her talking, and her breath will smell gorgeous!

When you’ve been together for a long time, it can get a bit same old-same old when it comes to deciding what to do for date night. This little book holds 16 coupons, with suggestions for romantic places to go and things to do. A lovely little stocking stuffer which will last well into the next year.

Every time your wife leaves you a message, give her a message of your own with these little sticky notes. We all know wives are the heart of a family, but there is no harm reminding her every once in a while. And there is no way she will be able to write a nagging note after reading the message already printed on them!

Any lover of the written word will appreciate these bandages, decorated with various insults penned by Will Shakespeare himself. With 15 bandages, each one decorated with one of his insults, they will make her job of resident nurse much more bearable when you get a paper cut and are making much ado about nothing!

Any planet-conscious wife will be delighted to receive this highly unusual pen in her stocking this year. Made from eco-friendly natural wood, the pen can be engraved but is equally stunning left au naturel. Wooden it be a great gift to give this Christmas?

Ask most wives and moms what they would most like for Christmas, and they will answer ‘a rest’. And now you can give her exactly that! This little die has various household chores printed on the sides, so each family member can roll the die and do the job they land on! It might be small, but it can make a mighty difference to a frazzled lady!

Does your wife chew gum, and then never have a place to put it? If you are tired of being her go-to guy for a piece of paper for her to put it in, then this little gum saver is the perfect stocking filler for you! His cute little face is just asking to be filled! Slips easily in a pocket or purse, and is right there to hold her gum until she can find a trash can to put it in.

If you fancy spicing up your love life with the love of your life this Christmas, but don’t know how to broach the subject, this book will provide the answers without the embarrassment! With moves from the Kama Sutra played out by sock monkeys, it’s cute, hilarious, and also educational! And you might even learn a thing or two yourself.

Let her know you know your place in the pecking order, and protect her sleep at the same time. Made of soft satin, not only does it tell everyone to leave her in peace, but it will also soothe her tired eyes as the light is blocked out. And a rested wife is a happy wife.

Have you been looking for the perfect watch to buy for your wife, but can’t find one to fit her personality or her wardrobe? Then let her design her own! This watch comes with a tear resistant paper strap and digital watch, and can be decorated with anything she chooses – markers, paints, pens, even glitter of she wants to!

Christmas stockings don’t have to be full of cutesy, funny gifts. Sometimes they can be a great way of showing someone you care with a useful pressie too. And this is one such gift. The nifty little gadget will cut a seatbelt for quick release in case of an accident, and the pointed end will shatter the window, allowing a swift exit. So what you are actually giving is a life saver (and peace of mind for you!).

Your wife will surely appreciate this thoughtful little daily (several times daily) reminder that you love her, from top to bottom, no ifs and butts! Printed with its message of love all the way through, she will think of you every time she goes to the bathroom. Aw, sweet!

We’re not sure whether this is actually a gift for her, or a gift for you! If your wife’s bath time is your video games time, nothing can be more annoying than having to leave the action to go and wash her back for her! Now she can do it for herself with this loofah back scrubber, and you can keep on gaming. Of course, she will also have the same excuse when you want her to scrub yours!

This little joke kit contains everything a premenopausal woman might need. Sun screen (to keep the wrinkles at bay), a folding fan (to ease the hot flashes), pencil and pad (for memory loss) and many more joke (but handy) items to help her navigate the stormy waters!

Keep your wife’s wine fresh, and her attitude fresher with this set of four silicone wine stoppers, telling anyone who dares to try and sneak a glass, in no uncertain terms, what she thinks of that idea! When she goes to pour (yet) another one she can just flash the ‘Doctor’s Orders’ stopper and you won’t have a leg to stand on! And if you do complain, she can just tell you to ‘Kiss her Glass’!

Himalayan Salt is not just pretty, it has a wealth of healthy properties, especially when used as a lamp. By releasing negative ions into the air when warmed, the salt is said to improve sleep, boost blood flow, and calm allergy symptoms. Particularly useful when used near electrical devices, as the electromagnetic radiation from these devices are neutralized. So you’re actually giving much more than just a pretty candle holder

Just because something is functional, it doesn’t necessarily follow that it has to be boring or plain, does it? Candles need matches, but a box of them doesn’t look particularly pretty on the mantelpiece, and neither does a lighter, come to that. But these matches, contained in an apothecary-style jar, look stylish and classy. The matches are available in a variety of different colors, and the match striker is cleverly concealed on the bottom of the jar. Simple and elegant.

You know she’s a wonder woman, the kids know she’s a wonder woman, but does SHE know she’s a wonder woman? Let her feet do the talking, and be a constant reminder to her that she really is your super hero. And they even come with their very own cape!

Is your wife fastidious about keeping her car clean? Does she get mad when you or one of the kids drops so much as a wrapper in the footwell? If that sounds all too familiar, then this handmade in-car trash bag could be the best gift she could receive. They can be made in various colors and designs to suit the car, and come with a handle to loop over the gear shift.

Little Women has been a firm favorite with readers for decades, and will be in a lot of top ten lists of best books ever. These pencils are a beautiful way to give your wife a little bit of childhood nostalgia, every time she needs to write something down. The pencils are wrapped with pages from the book, and presented in a pouch to keep them safe. A beautiful gift for any book lover.

For the tea drinker of the house, when everyone else drinks coffee, comes this incredible tipping teacup. When a teapot just isn’t practical, simply put tealeaves in one side, pour in boiling water and let it steep. Once the tea is strong enough, tip the cup in the other direction, away from the tealeaves, and hey presto – perfectly brewed tea every time.

Women rarely sit down long enough to enjoy a hot cup of coffee or tea. So the solution would be to give her something to keep her cup warm for longer, right? And here we have it! This adorable, handmade cup cozy will not only keep her coffee warm, it will also stop her from burning her hands AND it will bring a little splash of color to her day. What more could she ask?

Concede the point this Christmas with this cute, retro style tin plaque. After all, she is always telling you she’s right (and deep down you know she is anyway) so why not prove it to her with a sign she can hang in the kitchen, hallway, bathroom, or anywhere else you she might be able to see it on a daily basis. Instead of telling you every day, now she can just point it out!

A great little gift for a wine loving wife this year! Designed to sit on a shelf, this handmade sign has a rustic, slightly worn look (we’re not making comparisons, honestly!) and will serve as a constant reminder that drinking wine is a GOOD thing! After all, aren’t we always on the road to self-improvement?

These are cute! So maybe scrubbing pads aren’t the most glamorous of presents to give to your wife at Christmas, but she’ll forgive you in light of their uniqueness! No more ugly, out of shape scourers – these are cheery and bright and will make washing up much more pleasant, which might come in handy if she makes you do it by way of a thank you!

Is your wife commiserating the fact that she’s getting older? Is she constantly checking the mirror for wrinkles, and the backs of her hands for age spots? Stuff this Over the Hill Diaper Kit in her stocking and it’ll take her mind off the aesthetics, that’s for sure! Comprising an oversized diaper and a giant diaper pin, you’d better be sure she has a good sense of humor before she unwraps it, or the diaper pin may well be used against you!

Let her know that she really doesn’t have to be superwoman all the time, with this cute fridge magnet. Every time she goes to the fridge she can be reminded that the housework will still be there tomorrow (which is what she’s afraid of!) but for today she should take a step back and just have fun with the kids.

A bouquet of flowers is always a lovely gesture, but a single rose can’t be beaten for romance. With this vase, which attaches to the air vents in the car, she can have a daily reminder of how much you love her. Sneak into her car before you go to work and put in a fresh flower once in a while, just to send her off to work or on the school run with a smile on her face.

Turn the tables this season, and take your turn being the ‘tea boy’ for a change. With this adorable little bell at the side of her, your wife can ring for service whenever she fancies a brew, instead of being the one who always puts the kettle on. Don’t forget the cookies.

Personalize your wife’s car with this gorgeous hanging monogram, which looks awesome dangling from her rear-view mirror. Available in various colors, and with a bow to match, it will make a change from the usual mirror adornments and air fresheners.

What is it about the movie Titanic that keeps so many people hooked? If your lady is one of those, then she will definitely appreciate this stocking stuffer. Each tray makes four Titanics and four icebergs to float in her drink – shame there isn’t a tiny Leonardo DiCaprio too!

Fed up with the usual furry steering wheel covers and looking for something a little classier for your wife’s car? This cover is made from elephant adorned fabric, but there are many more to choose from, to match with her car and her interests. Great for protecting hands from a hot wheel in summer, and an icy one in the winter.

It’s one thing to love someone, but quite another to like them as well. This necklace will remind your wife that you do both! It’s simple and understated, but will be worn close to the heart as a daily reminder of how much she means to you.

Nobody likes warm wine, but the alternative is having to go to the fridge every time you want a top up. Not anymore! This nifty little device is kept in the freezer, and once the first glass of wine has been poured, the corkcicle can be used in place of the cork to keep the wine lovely and chilled.

With 72 magnetic words, this little tin is an ideal gift for any wordsmith or message writer in the family. They can write poetry, love notes, even shopping lists (with a little creativity) instead of using generic post-it notes. Suitable for any metal surface, even a car hood!

How cute is this? Sure, Christmas trees should be filled with silver, and green and read, and covered in glitter, but sometimes less is more. This gorgeous Christmas ornament features two interlocking jigsaw pieces, inscribed with the words ‘Me’ and ‘You’. They wouldn’t even look out of place year round. Very sweet.

Now, we’re not saying that your wife’s moods are down to impending menopause – we wouldn’t dare! But this warning sign could just take the heat out of the situation when she’s getting hot under the collar. It will either make her laugh, or give her something to throw at you! Either way, it’ll ease some of her stress.

Let your wife know you feel her pain with this wooden plaque which tells a story we’re all too familiar with! Sympathize with her weight loss journey, and show you understand the struggle of one step forward and twenty steps back! And don’t forget to tell her you love her just the way she is!