Somewhere in our lifetime, we are blessed with a friend who is there for us during good times and bad. And so, the careful, heartfelt – and sometimes humorous – selection of best friend birthday gifts is of paramount importance. Laughs, hugs, love, and mutual respect are priceless benefits, available through/to you and your dear compatriot.
Novelty Grow A Boyfriend
Tired of your man sitting in front of a TV watching sports and not paying attention to you? Here’s an easy, affordable, funny-as-heck, no talk-back solution: Grow a Boyfriend. Just drop this new consort into water and within 72 hours, he will grow to be six times his original size and your new buddy. Outrageous!
F This Shit Show: Gratitude Journal for Tired-Ass Women
Life can be exhausting no matter what she does – executive, housewife, or mother. Let her unload with this irreverent gratitude journal. Filled with prompts to make her re-evaluate her day, this journal contains quotes, activities, and a generous helping of expletives (which science has shown to be a great de-stresser).
Help her celebrate the female form in all its shining glory with one of these amazing Goddess Figure Candles. Available in three shapes to match all figures, you can choose from the slender Tolani, the medium build Bré, and the fuller figured Gina. Made from beeswax, they come in three colors, too.
Appeal to her silly sense of humor with one of these ‘Fowl Language’ mugs. The perfect funny best friend birthday gift for her, this mug has brightly colored illustrations of several birds, each with their own risqué and often downright rude names, like the blue-footed boobies and the cock-of-the-rock!
If fortune cookies are the best part of a takeout for you and your bestie, switch things up a little by giving her a set of Misfortune Cookies, instead. The exterior is as dark as the predictions inside, but they are delicious nonetheless, and will make a fun addition to her birthday meal.
If she values quality over quantity, this wooden box sign will make an excellent addition to her bedside table or desk at work. Measuring 4” x 4.5”, this distressed black sign features pretty white detailing around the sides, and a funny best friend slogan on the front.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and she will wish she had the gift of it when she finishes the last few drops of her coffee from this hilarious mug. Holding 12 fluid ounces, this unassuming white ceramic mug hides a deep dark secret, which it reveals in a message on the bottom.
Your plant loving pal will be able to add some furry fun to her indoor greenery with a set of these super cute hanging animals. They come in a set of three, and you can choose between Jungle Creatures and Aussie Friends – they’re made from stainless steel so they’ll stay looking good forever.
Give her a giggle every time she has a tea or coffee with this hilarious mug. Made from ceramic and holding a respectable 12 fluid ounces, this mug has some not so respectable plants printed on the outside, from the dubious-sounding Sticky Willy to the uproarious Shagbark Hickory.
If she’s known for being indecisive about which flavor chocolate to have, give her a bar of Miss Maude’s Secret Single Behavior and she won’t have to choose between her favorites. One bar of this rich, organic dark chocolate contains 8 amazing flavors, including Red wine, Saltines, and Peanut Butter.
All she’ll need to add to this gift is whipping cream to create a batch of homemade delicious, creamy butter. Fitted on top of a Kilner Jar is a wooden handle that gently churns the cream until it becomes a soft, pliable spread – there are recipes for creating flavored versions, too.
If she has kids, help her to preserve the precious things they say with this fabulous wall art idea. All you need to supply are the child’s words, along with their name and age if required, and she’ll receive a vibrant framed or unframed 11” x 14” print to hang on the wall.
This might look like an elegant, sophisticated gift, but in fact it comes with a very rude result! Made from paraffin wax and natural dyes, the fingers of this lady’s hand can be lit to provide four glowing flames, but that four includes the thumb, leaving the middle finger fully intact!
It might not be de rigueur for a lady to carry a hip flask, but with this book she can be discreet and sloshed at the same time! Made from a reclaimed library book, this clever Flask Book Box has the pages hollowed out, providing the perfect hidey-hole for the included 6oz flask.
Being an adult is hard, but coffee helps, lots and lots of coffee. This candle will fill the home with the aroma of dark espresso and vanilla whipped cream, and will burn for approx. 40-50 hours. The funniest part, though, is the label that says it’s infused with insufficient funds.
The Sisterhood is not forged through blood, but rather through shared interests and experiences. Show her how much she means to you with this ‘Unbiological Sister’ necklace. Made with a silver plated, gold plated, or rose gold plated finish, this necklace comes on a presentation card that explains what it means.
If your BFF is a crazy cat lady, this Cat Butt Coloring Book will make a funny best friend birthday gift for her. The ideal way to relax and wind down after a hectic day, this coloring book is packed with line drawings of cats and their butts, just waiting to be colored in.
Whether she loves, loathes, or is indifferent to fish, she won’t be able to resist the playfulness of these cute aquatic earrings. Reminiscent of prizes won (or not) at the fairground, these earrings are made from acrylic to resemble a pair of clear plastic bags filled with water and fish.
We’re sure you’ve shared many a bottle of plonk between you, but now that you’re older it’s time to start taking your responsibilities a little more seriously, and that includes not leaving ring marks on furniture! These coasters will protect the table, and give her a giggle at the same time.
If she likes the kitchen to herself when she’s cooking, give the rest of her family and friends fair warning with this funny Blue Q Oven Mitt. Printed in shades of pink and yellow, this retro-style mitt tells them she has a knife, but what she’ll do with it is anyone’s guess!
She might be an a**hole, but she’s your a**hole, and that’s what makes your friendship work. Remind her that she’s your favorite one with this funny key fob. Made from stainless steel so it will stay looking as good as she does, this key fob will make her smile every day.
This game is not for the faint of heart. It is, however, for the brave of spirit. There are 250 questions posed – many considered offensive and disturbing according to public opinion – with the ultimate strategy involving a vote among your friends to determine strategies during horrible situations. Test, explore, and be prepared.
Before embarking on a run, fill your comfortable sports bra with 25 ounces of your favorite beverage: is it the magical hydrating power of water or the rewarding graces of wine? Your choice! The medium-sized bra is equipped with a drinking tube and easy-to-use on/off valve, so cheers to your oenophilia and athletic prowess!
True friends come to your rescue when you need them and the gift of laughter helps heal wounds of many sorts. So, when you receive this esteemed message assuring you that your best friends will help you in your hour of need – hmm, sarcasm? – your love for them will bloom with fervor, wisecracks, and buffoonery!
Keep her butt as beautiful as she is with the Bawdy Bite It butt mask. Made with plant-based ingredients including aloe leaf gel and chamomile, this collagen mask will hydrate and tone tired tushies, leaving them smooth, plump, and free of lines and wrinkles in just 10 to 15 minutes.
A filthy mind can turn anything smutty, and this Fifty Shades of Chicken turns food porn into an art form! Hilarious yet practical too, this book contains fifty chicken recipes to tempt her tastebuds, from the succulent Dripping Thighs to the luscious Chicken with a Lardon.
This just could be the most important gift you ever give her. Equipped with three powerful LED bulbs for far-reaching illumination, this tiny handheld device also discharges a powerful 6 million volt to disable and stun a would-be attacker, buying her valuable minutes to make her escape.
She won’t lose her comfort is she has to get up to change the channel or fix herself a snack, because where she goes, her blanket can go with her too. Made from a soft, fluffy Sherpa fabric, this blanket sweater has a hood, pockets, and bags of room.
Imagine your friend receiving this award of distinction and their reaction of complete and utter surprise, appreciation, and love: The Best Friend Trophy! This replica is renowned as one of the world’s most recognizable awards and your friend’s loyalty, devotion, and friendship is award-winning on every level within your heart and soul.
She’ll have the best hair at any party with this ingenious Paddle Brush Secret Flask. Designed to look (and work) like a real paddle brush, this clever gadget hides a secret flask in the handle. Holding around 6 fl. oz. of liquor, this brush also features a mirror on the back.
When it starts to get ‘nippy’, help her keep her tatas snug with this pair of funny Hooter Heaters. Made to resemble red knitted hats with a white bobble on the end, these handy novelty warmers will keep her modest while also avoiding taking someone’s eye out.
If she enjoys a nice glass of wine, this hilarious holder will make the funniest best friend birthday gift for her. Designed to hold any stemmed glass from 6oz. to 32oz. this holder comes with an adjustable strap, and two quick-release clips so she can get to her glass quickly.
Yearning for a cuddle from an ultra-warm dude? Watch this easy-to-follow, tongue-in-cheek video that helps with the creation of a Boyfriend Pillow. Make it yourself for a very affordable price tag with a fuzzy flannel shirt, some stuffing, and hand-crafted loving. Voilà, your new snuggle pal. Be sure to check out this cool three-minute video.
This notebook makes a super cute gift for a best friend. Available with a choice of page quantities and cover thickness, this sweet journal’s main attraction is the ‘realistic best friend contract’ which is printed on the front (which comes in nine stunning colors).
There are times when clouds are gray and funk prevails. This super cool mug brings about cheer, giggles, and perspective with an oh-so-appropriate mantra that begs, proclaims, and states: “Don’t Be a Salty Bitch.” So, please fill this 11-ounce mug with coffee, tea, wine, or favorite libation, and know that friendship and love are yours.
Vilified by some, idyllic for others, this perfectly sassy gift is made of hemp – also available in cotton – and is supreme for best friends who take no prisoners. Available in a 12-inch, double bracelet cord with zinc alloy or brass metal beads, the bracelets tie and are meant to be permanent. Triple/quadruple/more also available.
The concept of “yes please, I’ll have another glass” propels to a level of Ultimate Bliss with this two-piece wine glass set that, quite simply, allows two people to share a 750ml bottle of wine without having to refill their glass. Stock up on your favorite red, white, or both, and invite your pal over.
Make sure her stash of ice cream stays safe and uneaten with the Euphori-Lock Combination Lock. Designed to fit perfectly onto a pint carton of delicious Ben and Jerry’s, this lock comes with its own combination of numbers to unlock the device and gain access to the ‘treasure’.
How far would you go for friendship? If you’d go as far as shanking someone right in the kidney, then this candle is perfect for your BFF. With a burn time of up to 110 hours, depending on size selected, this funny candle comes in a variety of phthalate-free scents.
A friend with a sweet tooth is easy to buy for, but if you want to go one better than a standard gift of candy, choose this gigantic gummy bear, instead. Weighing a substantial 5lbs and roughly the size of a dinner plate, this cherry flavored bear will keep her sweet.
She can see visitors off on their ‘journey’ with humor and fun when she has this fun mat at her door. Made with a non-woven fabric top and non-slip rubber backing, this cute mat measures 23.6(L) x 15.7″(W), and is machine washable to keep it looking as good as new.
Treat her skin to a full facial with the Zombie Pack. With enough ingredients for 8 masks, this mask can be mixed and applied in minutes, and then washed off after 10 minutes to reveal youthful, glowing skin. It can even help to diagnose problem areas on the face.
Make her glitter like the queen she is with a tube of Unicorn Snot Body Glitter Sunscreen. Offering an SPF of 30, this glittery sunscreen will not only keep her skin protected from UVA and UVB rays, but it will also make her skin glimmer and shine with a subtle magical shimmer.
Downright sarcastic or passive aggressive, your best friend will truly appreciate the message which this ceramic mug will give to work colleagues, friends, and family, while sitting back and enjoying their coffee.
un]documented fact. Some may call the two best friends and so, the pairing of fries with a burger bears stating on a pair of gal-pal T-shirts. The cartoons are super cute, super funny, and the cotton-blend, scoop-necked, short-sleeved T-shirts are super comfy.
Oh dear, the shame of The-Memory-I-Should-Forget. Release Method: Immerse and steep that nasty energy with a rejuvenating and relaxing soak in a luxurious bath of pink sea-salt crystals. Glowing and glittering with girl-powered sparkles and premium bath salts, there are therapeutic benefits to this Bachelorette Party, Divorce Party, and Ladies’ Night party favor, including no guilt.
Spice up, rock on, and clean up your kitchen with hand towels that affirm and proclaim super cool lyrics and statements: Beat It, Whip It, Chop It Like It’s Hot. Brilliant humor borrowed from great songs of The Past will rev up your prized kitchen space and keep you and your cuisine pals grooving while sizzling.
If she’s prone to stress and anxiety, tell her to ‘calm the f*ck down’ with these bath salts of the same name. Choose from four vibrant colors and scents, including the pink white tea and jasmine, and have her relax amidst the swirling hues and sparkling biodegradable glitter.
Made using recyclable or renewable materials, the Squatty Potty would make a funny best friend birthday gift for her. The serious side to this gift is that it helps users poop healthily by automatically putting them in the optimum position, while also being endorsed by a sparkly, fabulous unicorn!
For our cherished, forgetful pals, honor them with a solid brass, copper, or stainless steel keyring that will negate the question: “Where did I leave my keys?” Engraved with the feeling that “We’ve been friends for so long I can’t remember who the bad influence is,” your BFF will keep your humorous affection close by.
If she’s your favorite person, or even your only person, this candle will make a great birthday gift. Choose from three sizes and a plethora of delicious vegan-friendly scents, and remind her of how you really do hate everybody but her. Hand poured using natural soy wax.
There’s a dear friend in our lives, close to our homes and always in our hearts, who one day moves away. This BFF long distance mug personifies, exemplifies, and memorializes the special place that this extraordinary person holds for us. Please check out the site for easy instructions on making this beautifully simple heartwarming gift.
No matter what breed it is, a dog on a bicycle looks cute. Brighten her day with a t-shirt that sports a pooch on a pedal bike, and is super soft and comfy, too. Available with a whole host of hounds to choose from, this sweet tee is not to be missed.
Ah, the epic tale of two friends who embark on a road trip with unforeseen circumstances lives on in many hearts and DVD trays. Demonstrate your friendship by bestowing your bezzie mate with a super-soft Thelma or Louise T-shirt, available in myriad forms: racerback, tank top, crop top, V-neck, and more. True friends live on.
Super cute and incredibly comfortable, these panties will make a fun gift for the best friend who loves cats. Made from soft polyester and cotton, these white panties feature the sweetest kitty face on the front, and come in sizes extra small to XXL.
The term ‘cat lady’ can be used as a derogatory term, but any true feline-loving female will adore being given this moniker. Help her display her love of all things kitty with a set of temporary tattoos, all 3 of which feature a delightful image of a sweet little moggy.
It doesn’t matter how pretty a bra is, the chances are it’s going to be uncomfortable. Give her the freedom to go braless with a set of Sticky Bras. Waterproof and sweat-proof, these sticky pads adhere safely to the skin, keeping boobs pert and upright while doing away with torturous, unsightly straps.
If she likes to start (or end) her day with a bowl of cereal, this antique spoon will make the perfect birthday gift. Hand stamped with ‘cereal killer’ on the bowl, this silver plated spoon makes the ideal ‘weapon’ for making breakfast disappear without a trace.
If you want to show your bestie that you love her without sounding too mushy, this pendant makes a sweet but funny best friend birthday gift for her. Made from antique silver, this anatomical heart is both cute and creepy, and hangs on a choice of chain or leather thong.
Periods are something all women go through, and yet they can still feel mortified when a stray tampon rolls out of their bag. Keep them hidden in plain sight with this fun Shark Week Tampon and Maxi Pad holder. With room for several items, it measures 6” x 5”.
Not for those who like their ear gear understated, this octopus ear cuff will make a quirky addition to her jewelry box. Available in antique bronze or sterling silver, this kraken wraps securely around the ear, letting its tendrils snake out across her lobe.